I’m the most un gayest person you can meet!

No I will admit the camp voice, the love of romance novels,
and the love of boaby, does not go with the above statement.

But I’m fat, bald, face like a smacked arse and my sense of
style, have a lot to answer for.

I don’t even have the sense to scream at boy bands, (other
than joy, when one goes loopy on drugs, smashed oot his mind, in the priory) I hate
also stupid shitty Simon Cowell talent shows,

In ye olden days we used to line up at the Looney bin, and
point and laugh at the Looney’s, now we watch a two ton chav, with the pulled
up hairdo and the clothes that would put a blush on the face, Taiwanese hooker.
Thank they have a talent , oor we Simon rubs his hands together and says we
have a winner, hurrah another shitty song in the market, god bless the British
public and all who ride her, (we have been fucked by Simon since he started.)