My arse is going to be on candid camera!

It’s not the procedure that is going to frighten me, it’s
the fact I will have to wear one of those gowns with my arse hanging out the

Many thoughts go through your mind the biggest is the C
word, but as so far, touch fake wood, I have not had any serious health probs,
(if you forget the headaches or the inconsiderate need to shit myself!)

Personally all I care about is to get a solution to this as
is degrading, and there is many including people I work with believe its all I’m
my head, (all I can say to these people with ‘doctorates’ that every time I soil
myself I feel like throwing myself in front of a car!)

I am the type of person who cannot abide mess on myself. If I
get a bit of food on myself for example, I have to immediately have to change
myself, (much to my mother’s dismay,) it’s the fact that the pain of the
trapped gas in my stomach is excruciating, and the uncontrolled dioreah, makes
me feel dirty, and sick inside.

I will now have to go back to work and explain myself in my
work’s answer to a kangaroo court. To tell them that I have got a bowel of an
80 year old with a Tena nappy!

If it ever gets to this stage the tablets will be used!