Working me to my death, is the new thing!
Who needs Nazi death camps, when you have call centres!
I have noo been talking to you, because I’m so tired all the time, and the headaches are getting worse.
don’t feel sorry for me though I picked this horrible role
I am slowly loosing it!
I have not really described what it is like to go through a migraine attack, it is not a nice thing!
That is putting it mildly, it is fucking horrible, in its mild form, your eye expands and feels like someone has jammed a red hot poker through it, every sound you here reverberates in your head and you wish to shut out all light, that is in its mild form, last night and today, it felt easer if I just cut my head off, it would be actually better if I did not awake,.
The pain in the head starts to get totally worse so that it vibrates the whole of my skull, every slight movement, every slight bit of light hurts, and it’s ongoing, it doesn’t stop, you can’t stop it.
I have tried every painkiller known to man ether, the worst of those was Tramadol, now it takes the pain away easily, and you can go for weeks without pain, but if you take Tramadol all the time, when you come off them, the first symptom I got was insomnia.
Co-coda mol has been the one to save me over these nights, god bless Co-coda mol, ( if you believe in high sentient beings!)
Now all we need to pray for is this heat to go away and get back to the miserable rain, I like the rain, you feel more alive, also it’s calming, you don’t get this with the sun, all you get is skin cancer and feeling hot and sweaty, and that is something I cannie stand!
Hello, welcome, good evening, and pull up a chair!
Take off the sling-backs, loosen the straight jacket, and lets party!
I’m fed up, I am again back ill with may head issues, they are getting worse again, physically hurting me. This may also effect my job, and keeping it, knowing the way my luck runs, it won’t be the latter!
The stress in the house is getting worse, my little shit head of a brother is still ruling the roost, and my father is allowing him.
He, of course is taking this out on my mother, and now me, god forbid I loose my job, and the great luxury of my wage diminishes to nothing.
The pressure is getting more and more difficult, doesn’t help with the lack of understanding at work.
We are getting more and more treated like cattle, when one of us ‘goes funny’ we are dragged to a dark room, and a ‘new wan’ is ‘plonked’ is our place.
So I’m stressed out my box today, with a migraine that could sink the titanic, and every sods away with the lifeboats.
To-da-lo!
Well, I am pissed!
I’m also going into a downer!
We don’t live in a free society, if your rich, you stay rich, die happy and get remembered, if you are poor you stay poor, you don’t die happy, (well maybe, if you have had a hard life.)
I myself, go through life, from one shithole mistake, to one shithole mistake, not realising what I can do to fix it .
Books are my salvation, this is what keeps me going, I f I did not have my books, I don’t know what I would do.
I am in a frank kapra movie in reverse!
Its the one where you want to kill yourself @ the end! ( not that watching a normal frank kapra movie, wouldnt want you to do that, they are so fucking sickly nice!)
You would for slave wages, you take all the stress of the job on you head, when you get ill with the migrane attacks, and you are not earning them money, they come down on you like a sack of shit, wanting advising you it better not happen again, but can we do anything to help, big hint don’t heap the stress on me in the first place!
Not that this thought will come over to them, we are on a convayer belt of life, your born your useful for a couple of mins, then your fertliser!
Probably the most useful in your life is to be worm food.
I dont want to be down, all the time, but there are two kinds of people in the world, the winners of this world, and the losers!
I fall into the later camp.
I am not saying if you are a winner, your rich and sucsessfull, your most of the time not. What you are, is that you can see the people around you, you see their weakness and you pounce.
take my little brother for example, he sails through life, gets in to trouble for most of it, apple of my fathers eye, (mainly as i think he sees more of himself in him.)
My little brother has a tempestious relationship with my mother, calls her all the f*****G bitches under the sun, she on this gives just as good back, real heavy mental abuse on my brothers part. We finally get rid of him, and get peace and quiet in our lives then, he comes back with a sob story that his girlfriend has kicked him out and he is now living in a coalshed. Me the rational me, who has put up with these shouting matches from day one, voices the fact that he would not change, that one he gets his feet back under the table, it will be back to square one, no i was not listened to, as the poor baby, who could play auld nick at poker and come out winning, couldnt suffer!
6mths down the line the screaming match is back, he doenst contibute monies into the house, treats it like a five star hotel, and gang hut for him and his stonner mates, and i get her saying that it was a mistake to have him back.
That is how my little brother wins, he sees an advantage and holds an knife up to the throat, till he gets his way!
I will never be a winner, i always think the worst of myself, most of the time i am right too!
ho hum
nightie!
Well, still no well, but still struggling on.
I am watching television, and bored out ma tattie.
I am going to seriously re-evaluate my life because, i am going slowly nuts!
Top it all now, have the tom and dicks!
Dose some one upstairs have it in for me?
There is nothing worse than comeing out both ends, i hate the feeling sick at the best of times, but doing it in sterio.
I am on ma bed, feeling relly bad.
Well shock horror!
Who would have guessed?
I need a bloke, nothin special, just someone to play hide the sausage with.
Well iam getting old, and i dont want to be the cat lady!
