hello me

Morningcampers!

it’s been a few months since my last confession. Well been a bit Tom and dick. I could be found in my new home in the toilet.

I’m coming an old woman

I am a wreck!

I am a 34 year old man, 35 if I make it to the 25th
of this month!

Why do I feel like my life is over?

I will doubtless be alone, and I am vastly overweight. I also
suffer from severe migraines, now have depression, by the looks of it I’m a fun
person to be with.

But no matter, because I came into the world kicking and
screaming, will go out that way as well.

Hullo!

I have no come among you in quite a while; well I get bored
very easily!

I have now been diagnosed with
depression, (hurrah! I think reading my posts over the last year could have
told a simpleton that!)

Another illness to add onto the
others, I will be a walking wreck before I’m 40.

Happy new year has come, and I hope
to fuck turns out better than last year, but since the film, 2012 says we are
going to all cop our whack this year anyway, why not go out with a bang.

Why not go running down the
street, in the nuddie, singing show tunes?

Why not go up to that person you
really fancy, (but did not have the nerve,) and plank one on them, or even kiss
them. (hehehehehe)

I am sick of every ones perception
of how we all should be, I’m a man who likes boaby, (if I’d listened to the
bible I would be spit-roasting in hell, by now, or even worse like they do in
the states, PRAY-THE-GAY-AWAY, personally myself, I would take the
spit-roasting any day!)

I personally have also got to the
stage of zoning out when people are taking to me, if this is to do with the
depression, or just cannie be arsed listening to people, who can tell?

Any who happy final coming! And when
it does go out with a huge grin on yer face!

And don’t let the bastards get ye
doon!

Ta-ta

Andi

Hola!

Now I have thought about Suicide, deep dark thoughts. I have
carefully thought what I would do, how much it would hurt me, and how quick it
would be!

But not once have I ever warned people beforehand that I would
do it, I would not want anything to talk me out it.

My arsehole ex brother-in-law decided as my sister was not
giving him his way, he would pop the keys into the letter box, also a wee suicide
note, telling my sister he was goin to top himself.

Now how would you do it?

I have thought about jumping the tracks on railway line, in
front of a bus, or the old painkillers, the dickhead brother-in-law decided to
take train up to Edinburgh, and chuck himself off Arthur’s seat!!!!!

Yes that famous hill in Edinburgh, though funnily enough,
you would think we had enough tall buildings in Airdrie, but who am I to say. Unfortunately
this was a failed attempt, ( naw really!, I think maybe the letter posted would
allow the police to be alerted, and the fat idiot to be found, you know that,
and I know that, but not my sister, and the idiots family!)

The dickhead will not take no for an answer that my sister
didnie want the slimy c**t, he will have to make use of the w**k hand and f**k
off!

Scary Mary! How we all doing, well me I’m barely hanging on!

What is scaring me the most is the dizzy turns, I feel the
wee switch going off in my head, and I’m going for a wee ride, like what
happened a few nights ago, nearly in front of a car!

It’s my biggest fear that I am going to cop my whack at
work, and they will whirl those ‘fucking hospital screens’ round me and the
whole show will still going on round me.

I am also not looking forward to Christmas, if not more for
the weans of my sister, they have been used to the best of things from their
very short lives, now they will have to do with the meagre offerings this year.

And now the bastards in the banks are hording money now, and
not spreading it out amongst the people, if you want to become a banker or a
politician for the rest of your life you can do so, but you will need to get tattooed
on yer head ‘moneywhore’ and you must submit yourself to repeated ‘bummings’
and beatings!

That would be lovely, but these bastards will always win,
anyhoo I’m away to lie doon noo in a
dark room.

Hello peeps!

Well back at work and I’m feeling fine!

Look at the flying pig pass by my window, with Lord Lucan
and Shergar on its back.

S’pose I shouldn’t complain, I am getting one year closer to
death! (hehehehe)

Well as you can expect the holiday was a nonstarter, well
the being unable to breathe and having to take time off work, didn’t help. So
will need to go on wee journeys myself on the train, also save up for a
holibags for next year, as I’m no going through that again!!!

I’m also going to start learnin again, so I can get out of
the hole I’m in before it’s too late.

Well my
holibags was shit!

Well I was
expecting it, it’s me!

Well there
was the lack of money, being tom and dick again!

Also that
lovely word family, where do I begin?

My sister and
the thing from the black lagoon she married, she now wants to leave him, he
wants to hit the razors, I’m thinking of buying him a set of Gillette’s!

My brother,
yes shitty little brother is back on the dole again! Hurrah another seven years
of supporting the family I on the shitty wage I bring in, rather than my
brother feeding the pockets of Airdrie’s gangsters with his exotic substance habits.
When he is not chasing rabbits, my brother can be found giving verbal abuse to
my mother, and running a debit up with every company in the FTSE, Dow Jones
etc. my brother must owes tens of thousands, but rather than paying this off,
he moves onto the next company willing to giving something for nothing. I am on
a wage, and my credit rating is so low, you need a magnifying glass to find it!

Then there is
the thought of going back to work, to maybe getting the sack for being ill to
much, wouldn’t surprise me. Maybe should end it now! But knowing me I would probably
come back into someone in the situation.

Anyhoo to-da-loo

Hullo ppl!

God I hate text speak! If you go through the hell of school
to learn how to spell, please for goodness sake use it, even me Mr Dyslexic uses
spell checker, before I allow someone to read this!

I have nooo been weeeelll lately, rushed to ED to get myself
checked.

This was a mistake, if you have spent nearly 4 hours in a casualty
department waiting room, you will know that there is a hell on earth.

It got to the stage where I asked to leave and went to speak
to my doctor in the morning.

I got more blood taken then in a butchers, and then got
letter today to say I need to go back and get more done. To say I am shitting
myself is an understatement.

I have been reassured by my mother, that there is nothing to
worry about, but Mr Worry, Mr Paranoid, and Mr Shit scared of a slow painful
death, don’t want to listen.

I will be planning my funeral shortly!

I hate myself every time when I get ill, because I know most
of it is because I stress myself out too much, but the only other option would
be the ‘tell me about the rabbits’ tablets, (pity we don’t have Looney bins any
more, to be locked away in my room with the rubber wallpaper with the
zip-up-the-back jacket, zoncked out my skull, with not a care in the world.)

Well will I wait for the reaper goodnight

Andi