hello me

Crimble is here!

And the Morrison advert on TV would make you want to top
yerself. I know I am a wee misery guts but the whining manc voice of the woman
in the advert, makes you want to put yer head in the oven.

I have spent most of my money on presents, and I am poor
again, but I work for an out-scorcer, (so what’s new!)

I used to love Christmas, (I have previously mentioned
this,) not being able to sleep, now to me it’s another day with crap telly,
crap food, and the joy that in 30 days’ time, I will be another year older,
this time 35 uhhhheeehhh!

For a born again atheist as well,
it is a bit hypocritical celebrating in something you don’t believe in, (even
if I did, scholars In the bible, say Jesus was born in mid-June not December,
we nicked the date off the druids, like most of religion, someone else thought
about it before!)

The only people who benefit are
the shop owners, I mean I saw advent calendars in pound land in October!!!!

Talking of Morrison’s (or as I like
to call it a 3d version of an episode of The Walking Dead,) why is it look like
something you would find in a eighties episode of Last of the Summer Wine,
other stores like asda, Tesco, sainsburys, look modern looking, whereas
morrisons take you back to ye olde England shopping experience, ( they pride themselves
on market atmosphere, lovely jolly butchers, greengrocers, etc. but, and here’s
the joke, companies like this have railroaded the small wee independent shops
out of our towns, so we are left with ghost towns, and big ugly sheds, that
want to serve you everything.)

It also has come down to it that
we are left, thanks to the f*****g banks, with the rise of the poundstore! (Another
place where the walking dead congregate!) Went into one this week, where they
were playing on a loop, ‘saviours day’ by Cliff (I’m not gay) Richard, I wanted
to commit harri-karri in the middle of the aisle.

Then there’s the new SPORTS DIRECT
in Airdrie, (or as I like to call it, the re-establishment of jumble sales) the
old shop JJB is a prime reason why we are all bar stewards, yes they were
pricey! But the stock was all laid out nicely in shop, not all crammed in, I’m
not claustrophobic, but even I was taking panic attacks! And why are we reduced
to this? I hear you ask, why so we can get extra 50p off here and there!

Is the same with the moaning of
amazon and Google not paying corp tax, at the moment they are cheap, make them
pay tax, prices go up and we then call them all the bar stewards under the sun!

It’s the same with people like Virgin, people want more
channels, want faster broadband, but when you put the price up for a couple of
pounds, you may as well kill their firstborn, (nice little Christmas story Segway
there!)

We are a country that demands something for nothing, we all,
(and I include myself,) think we are all hard done by, we go on to forums, blogs
and vent our spleen, claiming if I don’t get this or that I’m going elsewhere.

Let’s be honest with ourselves here! There is NO SUCH THING
AS A FREE LUNCH!

We are all going to die anyway before the years up anyway
thanks to the hippies and the Mayans!

Hippy Crimble to you all any way!

I am sitting here watching my catch up of the week’s
programmes as while you watch your own TV, I have to work.

Boo-hoo!

The telly these days is crap! Nobody wants these days to
make good TV these days, we are ether to afraid the make the good stuff
anymore, as us Joe pubic have now got a say thanks to Facebook and twitter, anyone
with an opinion these days can stop a program. We love bashing the BBC as they
make us pay for TV, (we honestly do think that magic dusty fairies get the work
done foc.)

Everyone expects the best of TV but is not so forthcoming when
it comes up for payment, (believe me when I tell you I know!)

The other is that the TV companies don’t have the money
anymore, it’s about £30,000 per hour for one piece of TV and thanks to Bankers
we cannot afford any more good stuff, so more Joe pasquali, dale Winton, and
shit like that. Thank you bankers from the bottom of my heart!

I used to be in a building society (the Halifax,) they did
anything for you, (you were their boss so to speak,) then along came the
carpetbagger, a member of the building society who wanted to take the bank
public, thus shareholders, investors, Moula!

We even showcased these people on TV, they were proud they
went from building society to building society eating them up and making fortunes
from them, (do you think they invested those millions in the newly created
banks, or ones with tropical views from the door?)

This goes back to my argument, it won’t be weapons of mass destruction
that will kill us, not terrorists, not even religious nuts or politicians, it
will be ourselves, our greedy bloated, a want it tomorrow self’s.

Pleasant dreams

p.s. bloody Tesco ads make me want to buy music featured in them!

Ahoy-hoy!

Weelll I’m through the painful and embarrassing endoscope
exam.

The one down the throat is the one they warn you about as
you feel that you want to gag, and surprisingly considering this I gag quite
easily.

That was the easy one though the one up the arse, I will
never want to go through again, (even if it means my instant death!)

Its noo the cable up the bum that’s the problem, it’s the air
that they pump into you, it feels like you are about to explode, all I could
think about is that I was going to piss over the doctor that was administering the
exam.

Then at the end the embarrassing releasing of the air.

Still having problems with dioreah though and doctors still
cannot give me an answer. Cannot find cancer though so that is the main thing.

So back to work tomorrow, but strongly going to be sending
out my CV to any company that will have me, don’t want to work over the phone
anymore as I feel this is what is causing my illness.

Need to change my diet also, lots of fluid, greens, away
from carbs!

Also got the love of Christmas to look forward to hurrah!

Least the main thin will not have the issue of spending a fortune
on presents!

Ahoy-hoy

My arse is going to be on candid camera!

It’s not the procedure that is going to frighten me, it’s
the fact I will have to wear one of those gowns with my arse hanging out the
back!

Many thoughts go through your mind the biggest is the C
word, but as so far, touch fake wood, I have not had any serious health probs,
(if you forget the headaches or the inconsiderate need to shit myself!)

Personally all I care about is to get a solution to this as
is degrading, and there is many including people I work with believe its all I’m
my head, (all I can say to these people with ‘doctorates’ that every time I soil
myself I feel like throwing myself in front of a car!)

I am the type of person who cannot abide mess on myself. If I
get a bit of food on myself for example, I have to immediately have to change
myself, (much to my mother’s dismay,) it’s the fact that the pain of the
trapped gas in my stomach is excruciating, and the uncontrolled dioreah, makes
me feel dirty, and sick inside.

I will now have to go back to work and explain myself in my
work’s answer to a kangaroo court. To tell them that I have got a bowel of an
80 year old with a Tena nappy!

If it ever gets to this stage the tablets will be used!

Hows me being ill for the millionth time again!

Then what’s new going along on my merrily way and then fate
comes along and boots me in the teeth.

I didn’t think my dark thoughts would come back through, not
with all the happy pills I’m taking these days, but you think what’s the point, you slave your
arse off during the day, come home to what?

A empty life, that’s what, everything I have touched has
turned to shit, I have no carrier, have no one who wants me for me, basically I
am fucked.

Then there is two months time, my shit hole ex-brother in
law is going to be served and this is when the shit hits fan, the thing that
worries me is my mother, the kids are about to go in the middle, then my mother
will come into the frey, that’s what’s worrying me, if anything happens to her,
that’s it game over, I don’t think I will be able to go on.

Anyhow we now have the fight with the neighbours from hell
beside us.

To give you an idea think wendoline from wallice and gromitt,
and happyslap her till she looks like a wotsit then you have the image of her.

Miss (and I use this loosely,) hownowbrowncow, believe as
she lives in a paid house, and we live in a council house, she can lord it over
her like lady muck and we are the poor gypos. Anyhoos she starts anything, she
will be starting with the right one in my mother.

My arsehole ex brother in law is at it again, he claims he
wants to kill himself but can’t, I want to help him.

I have explained before he ‘tried’ this before, (I have
tried being straight before, it was not for me.)

He is still not getting his own way, (boo-hoo,) and his new
thing is to top himself on his wedding anniversary, and leave little notes for
his kids, (the kids who mean so much to him,) again telling my sister so she
can rush to his feet fling her arms devotevely round his legs and say “don’t do
it, I was wrong, you were always right, don’t leave me” the thing is my sister
could not care if he publicly hung himself from the lamppost on the main
street, the thing that concerns her is the children being left in the same
house when he does it.

So here goes from the bottom of my heart, GO ON KILL YERSEL!
Please.

As a person who has been there, I find it deeply disgusting
that he would use such a threat, when others like myself have to fight
constantly not to go through with it!

Hi hi

Well I havnie come to u for a while!

Well I am still going through my mood swings at the moment; I
have my good days and also my bad days.

It was not as bad as last year, but I am still easily having
dark moods.

I worry about my mother a lot, she is seriously getting immobile,
and she worries that she will end up like her mother.

Not that I would mind looking after her, she is my mother
after all, but I am frightened that she will do what she suggests and to top
herself.

I don’t think I would be strong enough to survive anything
like that, I want to protect her like any son would, (well perhaps not my
younger brother!)

The last thing, I am still on the happy pills!

I have not ranted to you for a while; well I do have a life,
(for the most part.)

I have been on the happy pills, from January, and have no
wanted to kill myself.

I have always been a guarded person; this is probably why I have
never wanted to be close to anyone. I have
always felt that it was a fact of life that I would always feel like this.

I am actually happy again, people don’t upset me anymore,
(well if they do I plot my revenge later on.)

Anyhoo I will keep in touch!

Ahoy-hoy